[BlondieParticipant]

This is probably one of the hardest things I have ever written. I’m not so good with sharing what is going on inside. But if my bb @irishalliwell120 can do it, so can I. Because it’s important you know the impact Tension has had.

When I first joined Tension, I was just a failing writer who sat in front of a blank screen every day wondering why something that I used to love was leaving me so utterly miserable. But here was this thing that sounded so cool and hey, if I was gonna be sat at this computer, I might as well be doing something. I never expected to become a part of it. I mean, there are so many reasons – I was pretty late to the party, I’m so far away and well, I’m *me*…

But you guys (both the Community and the Creators). Distance meant less than nothing to you. You have given me purpose again, a joy for life I don’t know if I ever had before, you’ve given me back the way with words I thought I had lost. There have been some tough times for me during the last couple of months. Some of you I have talked to about it ( @111error @aleocotillo @irishalliwell120 @nosnevets – there are actually no words in existence to express the depth of my love and gratitude and that is no exaggeration cos I checked the dictionary AND thesaurus 😉 ), others just knowing you were around if I needed you was more than I could ever have asked for.

Now I’m sitting here, packing a suitcase to come and see my new family. To attend Ascension. And YOU made this happen. I still keep expecting to wake up because this cannot be real, this cannot be my life!

In truth, I don’t need to ascend, cos Glory Be, I’ve already been saved <3 *cue the eye rolls*

• This reply was modified 8 years, 1 month ago by  Blondie.
• This reply was modified 8 years, 1 month ago by  Blondie.

[BlondieParticipant]

I, like Michelle, never really cared for the girl formerly known as Addison. No shock there, I was never quiet about that fact. Which I guess is why it was a bit of a surprise to some when I joined BOS. That was more to do with a matter of principles. My feelings towards Addison weren’t important. I am not the kind of person to sit back and watch anyone go through what I still consider to be emotional abuse by a cult.

But the Overseer, Addison 2.0, she intrigues me. And I look forward to seeing the change in her. I hope we finally get to talk.

[BlondieParticipant]

Did you get a reply @lukasrl?

[BlondieParticipant]

Thank you @lukasrl, I spent ages on it and came up with nothing…

[BlondieParticipant]

That is the gist I got from the French part. Definitely “I am stronger now” (je suis plus font maintenant) and taking on her role and “je me rappelle tout ce qui est fait” – I remember all that is done

[BlondieParticipant]

This all seems to be a matter of semantics…

I don’t doubt that many of the people within the walls have committed their lives to the OOA and are happy to be there. Some may even have cut all ties with their families, a common practice amongst cults. Whatever, my issue is not with the choices those people have made.

@thegilded: you say that someone begged you to take them with you, but you were prevented from doing so… So they are desperate to leave, but are not allowed to? That sounds to me like being held against their will. If they are free to come and go as they choose, they would not have needed to beg for your help. And you are not the only one to report attendants begging for help in escaping. Those who support the OOA may argue that this is merely part of the process these young women have to go through in their journey towards enlightenment. There was a time when one Addison Barrow was confused and afraid and look at her now. From wannabe actress to admin assistant to attendant to murderer to gatekeeper to overseer. It all comes down to whether you believe the ends justify the means. And that is for us each to decide as we experience Ascension.

@lmsmedley: Do whatever you believe is right. That is all anyone can do.

[BlondieParticipant]

@masterlock I look forward to finally meeting you, I know it will be an unforgettable experience. I hope we have the opportunity to talk.

[BlondieParticipant]

There is no need to question the future of BOS @aleocotillo. While we have to play the waiting game, it is only temporary. The reasons to stand against the OOA still exist, nothing has changed in that regard. That our former brother and sisters are now complicit in a dangerous and abusive organisation that feeds on the weak is beyond comprehension, but power is the ultimate temptress…

BOS doesn’t die because people turn away from our cause. There will be new brothers and sisters who see through the OOA’s smoke and mirrors and will not stand for their corruption and lies. Not all going through Ascension are blinded by the “glory”, there are posts on forum that attest to this. BOS will continue to grow. There are only 3 reasons for BOS to disband:
1) we accomplish our goal
2) there is a huge change in the OOA whereupon they cease all nefarious behaviour and move forward in light and truth
3) we give up

I won’t give up. But I will wait. Something is coming.

And I wish @electrichippo well on her _path. While her decision baffles me, I know it was not made lightly and she has done what she believes is right based on the information that she was provided with. Until I and others are privy to this information, we watch. We wait. But we continue.

[BlondieParticipant]

@kasch As someone who also wants answers, I wish you luck tonight

[BlondieParticipant]

Oh definitely! I have presents to distribute and need to see your gorgeous faces in the flesh so I can smush them <3

[BlondieParticipant]

Thanks @mkarrett <3 Gonna take this opportunity to say thank you again to everyone who has helped me. I’m very close to having enough for flights, it’s gonna be tight but I am doing everything to make this happen. I love you all xxx

[BlondieParticipant]

What I said was born out of frustration and a desire for an explanation of something I am struggling to understand and so maybe my tone was a little accusatory… By no means a personal attack on anyone in particular, I don’t think that’s ever been my style, but you’re all free to disagree 😉 Neither did I take @halfbloodfangirl‘s response as an attack, I welcome her perspective as someone on the other side who has been through Ascension. No-one seems to have any answers for me at the moment so I will wait and see what happens when I walk through the doors into the OOA…

[BlondieParticipant]

So we have young women kept there against their will and begging to be rescued? Old people trying to get word to the families they’ve been kept away from? And people still think the OOA is a good place? What the hell is wrong with you all?!

[BlondieParticipant]

@nerdyredhead Welcome! It’s always good to have a beginabuddy Mine was @aleocotillo – we joined in the same week and she’s now one of my closest friends in the world <3 You and @starryari1990 can totally do this. Just don’t be scared to reach out if you need any help or advice or clarification

• This reply was modified 8 years, 1 month ago by  Blondie.
• This reply was modified 8 years, 1 month ago by  Blondie.

[BlondieParticipant]

I share your pain, living in the UK it’s even further for me… but I can assure you that distance means practically nothing in terms of your involvement in Tension. Do what you can – and what you can’t, well you can live vicariously thru others. The community has been amazing at making sure I don’t miss out…
My top tip is to follow Tension on every social media site you can – Facebook/Twitter/Instagram and especially Periscope. It’s a bit quiet at the moment, but that just means it is the perfect time to catch up. Any questions, just holler…

[Author]

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